It was a Monday afternoon. We were to have our public speaking assessment as a requirement for one of our courses. The lecturer had let us choose the topics we wished to speak on. The issue of exhaling and having an attitude of gratitude was still fresh on my mind. So, I prepared a speech on Gratitude. That presentation drew applause from my classmates and earned me one of my highest continuous assessment scores for the semester.
Two weeks ago, I received a huge disappointment. The despair I felt was less in the magnitude of what happened than in the fact that I thought I deserved better. Many days after and I am still struggling to let go and move on. Every single day, I have filled my journal and recounted all the wonderful things that have happened in my favour. I have made myself smile for no apparent reason, just to send signals to my mind that all is well.
This reminds me that most of the problems we help others through can become our realest struggles too. I remember using Charles Swindoll’s quote that “life is 10% what happens to you, and 90% how you react to it” and I am wondering if I have been reacting well enough. I am worried that I may be unconsciously allowing an event define my peace of mind. In spite of that, I am trying to brave a storm that I taught my audience how to.
I am not effortlessly paddling this canoe. I am doing it, with moments of tears and relapses. But, I am still doing it.
I guess this is part of our humanity; the humbling truth that we need to continuously have personal prescriptions of the pills we serve others. Having the right words and pieces of advice for the challenges others have, does not make us immune to those challenges. It, however, means that since we know these things, we are better armed to cope when they surface. Say the words to yourself, and keep reminding your mind.