Two days ago, I moved from the hostel—a place I had called home for roughly forty-four weeks. The thought of packing up and setting out for another phase of my life was tiresome. As I struggled with lifting one item after another and dismantling carts and hangers, I was once more reminded of how much I hate my comfort to be ruffled up. I love adventures. I love exploring new places. I love meeting new people. However, the process of throwing things out of their hitherto serene positions, just to move, gives me jitters.
Another problem I have with moving is that I struggle with letting go of property.
You can find me staring at sheets of papers I scribbled on while studying for a test for minutes on end. You can find me pushing some magazines that I am certain I will never read again into the trash can and bending over the can to flip through its pages. You can find me hugging a pair of shorts I know I should leave behind because I am wondering if I’ll ever find any other like it. At the end of three or five hours, I am exhausted and I haven’t even achieved much of what I set out to do.
Then, there is the irony of my dislike for the sight of luggage. I still don’t understand how someone who hardly lets go of property frets when she sees luggage. You would expect that since I attach sentiments to papers, books and pairs of shorts, I should not mind the troubles of hauling everything along from place to place. On the contrary, I love to travel light. Only that I never travel so.
So, as I busied myself with emptying closets and filling up bags, my mind kept looking at all the truths about life that were shooting at me. To move on, things usually need to be lifted from their comfort zone. Nothing ever disappears and appears at its new location, except our subject of discussion is the mystery of teleporting. At some points in our lives, even things that were once indispensable may lose their usefulness and need to be dropped. And yes, you cannot keep holding on to weights and expect to travel this life lightly. One has to give way to the other. The power is now in having the discretion to know what to let go of and having the discipline and will to do so. I hope you find both.